I've bungee jumped. I've skydived. I've been on crazy Canadian cross country skiing expeditions. I've played Jackass: the Home Version. I've moved around like a nomad with ADD. Tats cover about 10 percent of my body. Basically, I'm a pretty crazy dude. Mile High Club, Polar Bear Club and every nightclub from the City of Angels to the MIA. I'm kidding of course, but it's not too much of a stretch.

AFC East: What is up with this division? Last week the Buffalo Bills, New England Patriots and New York Jets looked like world beaters. This week they just looked beat. To make matters worse, the Miami Dolphins squeaked by the lowly St. Louis Rams. Prediction: No AFC East team will advance to the Super Bowl. -- Full AFC East breakdown

AFC North: Meanwhile, the Baltimore Ravens could wind up repping the AFC in the Big Game. Pick yourself up off the floor, wait until your ribs stop hurting and read it again. The Ravens have the pieces to make another Super Bowl run. They're consistent and they haven't lost to a bad team all season. -- Full AFC North breakdown

AFC South: Andre Johnson. Super Mario Williams. The Houston Texans showed us that they're headed somewhere during their first-ever MNF appearance. On the other hand, those all-red uni's looked hideous. Seriously, the big boys looked like the Kool-Aid Man. -- Full AFC South breakdown

AFC West: -- Dr. Jay and Mr. Cutler. Holy Schizophrenia! What is up with the young quarterback and his Denver Broncos? Just how out there have the Broncos have been this season? Well, their feature back is a white dude -- and he's good. Peyton Hillis was the best Peyton in the league last week hands down. -- Full AFC West breakdown

NFC East: Even during a week where the Dallas Cowboys and Philadelphia Eagles looked brilliant, the New York Giants left no doubt as to who's the beast of the East. That bullet may have grazed Plaxico Burress' leg, but the fallout didn't do even that to the G-Men. This unflappable team looks destined to repeat. -- Full NFC East breakdown

NFC North: Now we know why Zygi Wilf spent a bajillion bucks on Bernard Berrian and Jared Allen this past offseason. Berrian caught a backbreaking 99-yard bomb and Allen lassoed himself three sacks. If the Minnesota Vikings had better quarterback play, they'd be legitimate Super Bowl contenders. -- Full NFC North breakdown

NFC South: -- Michael Turner: 31 carries for 120 yards. LaDainian Tomlinson? Try 14 for 24. If the Burner's not already better than L.T., he will be. The San Diego Chargers are now the team who let both Drew Brees and Turner walk. Way to go, A.J. Smith. Full NFC South breakdown

NFC West: What is it with the Arizona Cardinals and their complete inability to travel East? It's almost like a weird Derek Zoolander inability-to-turn-left thing at this point. The Eagles were already tied to the tracks, yet the Cards were the ones who got ran over. Some things never change. -- Full NFC West breakdown

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